Thai Ladyboys – Katoeys

A lot of people have a lot of different ideas about what a ladyboy is and what a ladyboy isn’t. First of all, a ladyboy is a person, with feelings like you and I. It’s a person that has fought a battle to be who she feels like she is – no matter what the world is telling her. A ladyboy has likely experienced a life quite different from her peers. She probably has had a tumultuous life. Probably she’s even had fist fights over choosing to be a ladyboy. Maybe she’s been beat or raped over it. I’ve talked to some that have told me they’ve been raped by guys and other ladyboys. I think it probably happens quite often.

I’ve never been beat up or raped because how I wanted to dress or act. Straight men acting straight grow up differently and don’t really get the whole ladyboy phenomenon. As I’m sure I don’t. Living in Thailand for over three years and having met many ladyboys and even called some ‘friends’ I want to share a little bit about my perspective on this unique group of people.

Andrew Dice Clay (Diceman) once commented on telling the difference between a gay man and others is that, “You either suck D, or you don’t suck D.” That’s all – that was his criteria. I thought it was funny then, but really there’s much more to it than that. In the case of what constitutes a ladyboy – there is MUCH more to it than that.

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What IS a ladyboy? I have a blanket definition that I usually use. It’s wrong sometimes, and a lot of people won’t agree – but, nobody agrees on the definition of what a ladyboy is – so… up to you. In general my definition is that being a ladyboy has to do with appearance. A ladyboy is a man trying to look like a woman. He may moonlight as a ladyboy or he may act that way every single day. He may have surgery to become a woman or he may just wear his sister’s stuffed bra and lipstick.

There are many words that are used to mean “ladyboy”. Here are some: lady boy, ladyman, girlman, girlyman, crossdresser, transsexual, tranny, trannie, shemale, she male, shehe, heshe, transgendered. Here in Thailand the Thai people call them “katoey” which is spelled many different ways: gatoy; katoy; kratoy; gratoy; kathoey; krathoey.

Wikipedia – that public encyclopedia that pretends to spew the unbiased truth about all subjects in the universe, calls a ladyboy,

What is a ladyboy? It’s easier to start with what a ladyboy isn’t…

What a Ladyboy isn’t:

1. A man that doesn’t either dress as a woman or change his appearance in some obvious way to look like a woman (makeup, nails, hair).
2. A man that hangs out with other, obvious ladyboys but doesn’t look like a woman. If he acts like a woman – no matter. Gay men can act as a woman, and yet not try to look like a woman at all. That’s gay, not ladyboy.
3. A man that shaves his arm hair, leg hair, underarm hair, tucks his trout between his legs and dances on the stage. If he’s not making an attempt to LOOK like a woman? If yes – ladyboy.
4. A man that has sex with other men – even plays submissive (bottom) and talks in a feminine way, yet doesn’t make any attempt aesthetically to LOOK like a woman.
5. A man that naturally looks feminine. Doesn’t try to look like a woman, but just naturally looks feminine. That has sex with other men – is gay, not a ladyboy.
6. A man that wears women’s clothes, maxi-pads, pantyhose or anything else traditionally reserved for women – which cannot be seen by the public. This is a secret crossdresser, not a ladyboy.

What a ladyboy IS:

1. All public crossdressers are ladyboys.
2. All men wearing lipstick, eyeliner, blush, eye-liner are trying to look like a woman publicly, and so – are ladyboys.
3. Any man with breasts as a result of ingesting estrogen or other hormones for the purpose of growing breasts – is a ladyboy.
4. Any man wearing a bra is a crossdresser, hence, a ladyboy.
5. A man dressing as a woman that has sex with or prefers sex with a man.
6. A man dressing as a woman that has sex with or prefers sex with a woman.
7. A man dressing as a woman that has sex with or prefers sex with another ladyboy.
8. A man dressing as a woman that has sex with or prefers sex with anything.
9. A man that has had transgender surgery to remove the male organs and create the appearance of female organs – functional or not, and regardless whether he tries to change his public appearance (clothes, makeup) to appear as a woman.

So, a working definition for what I think a ladyboy is would go something like this…

A ladyboy is someone that was born a biological man and may or may not have undergone surgery to change his aesthetic genital appearance to that of a woman. Most days he makes attempts to change his appearance to be that of a woman instead of a man. His reasons for wanting to look like a woman can be many and varied. He may want more attention. He may be self-employed as a ladyboy escort, masseuse, cabaret dancer, model or other occupation. He may not feel comfortable playing the role of a man. He may want to feel sexy in a womanly way. There are hundreds of possible reasons a man might want to act as a ladyboy, not all of which I could ever come up with. This man need not dress as a ladyboy daily, but probably does make efforts to look like a woman on a daily basis. Whether he has sex with man, woman or beast makes no difference. He need not have any sex at all to be a ladyboy.

There are some people that don’t fit the definition here. I’m not going to go into genetic abnormalities that create men without fully formed organs and such things.

Ladyboys are an incredibly diverse group of people – within their subculture. Here in Thailand it’s very interesting to watch them after getting to know Thai society a bit and understanding something about how Thai men and women act – and the role that Thai ladyboys play in Thai society. They have created their own niche (subculture) and within that subculture they struggle to find a place they belong… a group of ladyboys they feel comfortable with. There are butch ladyboys, hard-ass ladyboys, aggressive ladyboys, totally submissive ladyboys, shy ladyboys, hilarious ladyboys, ladyboy drunks, ladyboys addicted to narcotics, ladyboy boxers, ladyboy dancers, ladyboy actresses, rich ladyboys, poor ladyboys, ladyboys that don’t like sex, and ladyboy nymphomaniacs.

Most popular ladyboy links at this site and others:

• ULTIMATE Thai Ladyboys Guide >
• Interesting Ladyboys Observations.
• Thailands 3 Ladyboy Types
• Ladyboys, Katoy, Katoeys, Shemales, Another way to KNOW
• 150 Ladyboys in Pattaya, Patong, Patpong Passable as WOMEN
• 18 of the Best Ladyboy Movies all on one page >
• Do you really think you can identify ALL ladyboys? Look at this one >
• Asian Ladyboys Stories
• 25 Ladyboy Resources: Quiz, Research, Articles, Interview

Did you get it yet?

Over 100 pages of Thai ladyboy Tips and photos.

click ->>
Ultimate Thai Ladyboys Guide!

[ over 131,000 downloads and counting... ]

I’ve seen all these in Thailand. If you haven’t visited here – it’s worth it just for the chance to experience Thai ladyboys. You will leave Thailand with a broader world-view. Maybe even a ladyboy fiance!